


Twelve Years

by ardentmuse



Series: Sirius Black Imagines [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Book 3: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Established Relationship, F/M, Hogwarts, Hogwarts Professors, Marauders, Mild Language, Post-Sirius Black in Azkaban, Professors, Shrieking Shack, True Love, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-23
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-11-04 11:23:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17897525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ardentmuse/pseuds/ardentmuse
Summary: Remus informs you, also a professor at Hogwarts now, the night he sees Peter Pettigrew on the Marauder’s map and invites you to follow.





	Twelve Years

“Remus, this must be some kind of joke,” you said as you scrunched your face down to look at the Marauder’s map. Remus had called you into his office long after you had decided it was best to go to bed. Your night robe hung loosely around your form, doing little to stop the chill that passed over your body as you watched the black dot move across the grounds followed by tiny script that read “Peter Pettigrew.”

“I’m afraid it isn’t, Y/N,” Remus said, rubbing his brow with his thumb and index finger. After a steadying breath, he stood, snatching up the map and reaching for his wand. “Coming with me?”

But something else caught your eye. You grabbed for the map again, noticing another dot, following the children and the rat you once called a friend. A dot noting the presence of a man you had loved long ago, who had swore to you that Peter was to blame, a man you loved still if you let yourself. Sirius Black.

Your fingers traced over the dot, delicate, the way they used to run through his hair as he laid on your chest after a bout of passion. He’d kiss your collar bone and wax about all the wonderful things he planned for your future like taking his bike and riding into the Pyrenees to see the graphorns or living for a few years among the muggles in the States and never ever leaving his bed again. Your voice spoke the name like a prayer, “Sirius,” and you felt your heart open like a dam, emotions rushing forward so fast that the force could drown a man. You tried your best to catch your breath.

You dropped the map and were out the door of Remus’s office before he finished throwing on his coat, running down the corridor and taking the stairs two at a time.

Remus found you at the Whomping Willow, using a stick to press the knot to stop the branches. He grabbed at your wrist as you were bending down to crawl into the hole the space created.

“Y/N,” he said between his breaths, having wasted much energy running to meet you, “Are you sure you are ready for this?”

You were crying in desperation now, so needy to see him with your own eyes, to know he was real. You had mourned him once already, treating his conviction like a death sentence and yourself like a widow. You just needed to keep moving.

“I’ve waited twelve years, Remus. Twelve years without him. I won’t wait any longer.” And with that, you dove into the hole and began your run again, making for the abandoned home that you and your friends had once known so well, Remus hot on your tail.

By the time you reached the end, you were completely winded. Your robes were covered in mud and your face sweaty and streaked from crying. You were tempted to stop and compose yourself. But then you heard it, a voice that hadn’t graced your ears with its gravelly masculinity and melodic diction in so long you thought you had forgotten it. But hearing it now made it so clear just how little Sirius Black had left your mind in the decade plus since you tearfully parted ways as he was pulled from you in chains.

You wasted not a moment climbing the stairs and bursting through the door. You took in the scene: Ron on the bed with an injured leg, Hermione about the room, and Harry with his wand to Sirius’s throat, with Crookshanks doing her best to protect him.

“Expelliarmus,” you scream with a flick of your wrist. Remus appeared just in time to catch Harry’s wand as it came flying at your head.

“Where is he, Sirius?” Remus said, his voice hardened with purpose. But Sirius’s eyes were only on you, dark, cold, and piercing, lifeless in a way that you didn’t remember. But it was him alright, gaunt and starved, but still Sirius. The sight alone made you want to cry, but his next words made it even worse.

“Why did you bring her?” Sirius asked, clearly directing his words at Remus, but never breaking his gaze on you. The way he spit out the word “her” hurt, like you were somehow more of a vermin than the man you were here to eliminate.

“I didn’t,” Remus hissed, stepping forward to try and block his view of you. “Now, where is Peter?”

“Make. Her. Leave,” Sirius barked, doing his best to pull himself up from the floor.

You wanted to protest. You wanted to yell at him, to scream at him, to tell him that you could do whatever you damn well pleased. But you couldn’t speak. The man you loved more than the stars for which he was named wanted you gone. He couldn’t even stand looking at you. He couldn’t even say your name.

The tears started again. This time giant wails that shook your whole body as you looked on the withered form of your deepest love, so hardened and cold to you.

“Sirius,” you breathed, “Sirius, please.”

You looked at him in pleading but the instant your eyes met, he looked away, a dramatic turn of the chin that somehow hurt more than a simple rejection giving just how much of the old Sirius you could see in it.

Immediately, you turned and fled, running down the stairs and out the passage. You had no idea where you were going or what you were doing, but you needed to get away from him, from all of this. That was until your body hit a solid mass, one you couldn’t see, partway through the passage.

Slowly, a face came into sight. Dark hair and pale features and eyes piercing in a way not much different from the man you just left.

“Hello, Professor Y/L/N,” Snape said as he disarmed you. Quickly he grabbed you by the waist and holding his wand to your throat. You had no fight left in you. You slumped against his chest, welcoming the harm that his wand might bring.

Pulling the invisibility cloak over both of you, Snape took sure step back towards the Shrieking Shack. You didn’t do anything to help the movements, your mind and body completely numb in sorrow.

When you arrived back upstairs, you found the men deep in conversation with Harry, a rat you knew had to be Peter sat scared in Ron’s arms. Severus stood there with you waiting, listening, planning the exact moment to reveal himself.

When he did, everyone leaped to their feet in shook, but Sirius immediately went from surprised to fuming.

“You hurt her, Severus, and I swear–” he began but paused the instant Snape pressed his wand tighter against your throat.

“I wouldn’t try anything, if I were you,” he teased, twisting the wand slightly against your neck, “Two more for Azkaban tonight.”

“Severus, you had it all wrong. Just listen–” Remus was trying to reason by Sirius wasn’t going to let him.

“Send me back, Snape! Send me!” Sirius screamed, “If you harm a single hair on her head, I’ll be sure to give them good reason.”

“Ah, so I have found your weakness,” Snape mused, “Want to keep your pretty girlfriend here safe, hm?”

Sirius hardened himself against the words, option to say nothing.

Remus tried to send a blast Snape’s way, to release you from his hold, but Snape was faster, casting a charm that tied and bound Remus who fell in a heap on the floor.

“The lot of you and your women,” Snape said to himself with disdain before turning back to Sirius, “Come with me and I’ll make sure she stays safe. Maybe even keep her company myself if I’m so inclined.”

Sirius snarled at the last bit, bearing his teeth like he had gone rapid before he caught sight of your eyes.

Seeing the fight in Sirius was giving you strength again. Slowly it was becoming clear that his dismissal of you was out of fear, not hatred. Though now you could do but nothing with that information other than offer him courage. You would do you best to show your love in your face if that was what he needed.

Once he did met your gaze, he calmed and swallowed, his breath evening once again until he could address Snape properly.

“I’ll go with you, if you promise that no harm with come to Y/N–”

“Done,” Snape interrupted, loosening his grip on you only slightly.

“And that the rat comes, too.”

With a nod, Snape moved to bound Sirius, but Harry jumped in the way, screaming at him until both were so caught up in the confusion that Ron and Hermione were both able to get out a blast at the same time, sending Snape flying against the way and you falling into a crumpled pile on the floor.

Immediately, Sirius was at your side.

“My love, my love,” he called, patting your face as he pulled you into his lap, “Godric, this is why I didn’t want you here.”

Slowly you regained an awareness of your surroundings. Sirius’s face coming into view, his eyes no longer scary, but the calm, inviting grey you had spent so many hours staring into as a youth. He held your head so delicately, like a lover’s embrace once again, that you couldn’t deny yourself the simple pleasure of running your fingers through his hair once more.

“Longer than I remember,” you whispered to him, which made him chuckle.

“And you’re more beautiful than I remember,” he said in turn, his hands brushing at your cheeks, allowing the blood to return to them.

“I’m surprised you remember me at all,” you couldn’t stop yourself from saying.

“You were the only thing I allowed myself to remember. The one joy I wouldn’t let them take from me. My sunshine in all the darkness.”

“Why didn’t you come find me?” you asked.

“I promised you you weren’t with a murderer. I intended to keep that promise. When I decided I needed to murder Peter, I knew I could never come back to you. You’re too good for the vengeance I had in mind.”

You finally allowed your lips to move, needing to be connected to the man who served his time and still put your needs above his own. His lips were chapped and his movements much less certain than the casanova you had tamed. But the feel was the same, all love and consuming passion, promise of joys to come and happiness to be shared. You were just beginning to lose yourself to the man when voices behind you pulled you from his spell.

“Professor?” Hermione began, having just finished untying Remus from his bounds.

“Um, yes,” you said, beginning to stand and pulling Sirius up with you. His hand brushed against your engagement ring, which he just now noticed still adorned your finger. He brought the hand to his lips as you continued to speak. “I guess we should do something about this rat bastard, huh?”

“Yes, my love,” Sirius began, still running his lips over your band, “We really should.”

**Author's Note:**

> https://ardentmuse.tumblr.com/post/177634881536/twelve-years-sirius-black-x-reader


End file.
